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Okay, here is a touchy subject. **Warning**If you have children around you may want to read this later. It contains some spoilers! What do you tell your kids about Santa? How old do you believe kids should be before you start changing the story?
From early on as a mommy, I had trouble with Santa. I felt very uncomfortable with the whole idea of Santa. I didn't know how to broach the subject with my daughters about Santa. I didn't know how to respond to their questions. I even agonized over the whole 'wrapping paper recognition' thing.
Why so much anxiety over something people have done for AGES? First of all, I am a B rated liar. You remember the B rated horror movies, like 'The Gourmet Zombie Chef From Hell"? The effects were so unrealistic, they were comical. The story was so pitiful, it was amusing. That is the kind of liar I am. Infants can see through my facade. When my dear hubby is telling the girls a tall tale, they come and check with me, because I am on 'the trust list' (aka. can't lie list).
Then God blesses me with a natural defense attorney as a first-born. Here is a play by play from one of our discussions.
"Mommy, can I have some candy?"
"No. It's almost supper time."
I catch her with a piece of gum.
"Didn't I tell you you couldn't have any candy?"
"No. I asked if I could have any candy. You said no. You didn't actually say, Alea, you can't have any candy....and ACTUALLY, this is gum."
She was doing this at the age of five!!!!
So......you see my predicament. She will see through my lies for sure! I am so going to get busted, and not be able to lie my way out of it. Anyways, I am really struggling with the whole idea of encouraging my girls to be truthful, and to assure them that there is nothing they ever need to keep from us.....yet they learn best by the example we set, and we felt we were setting an example of lies. True, it was a harmless lie. Even a fun lie. But...it was a lie.
Then came the final straw. Alea told us that she prayed to Santa about what she wanted for Christmas. SHE WAS PRAYING TO SANTA!! Now, not only am I worried about being caught in a lie, or encouraging lies, our children are confusing God with Santa!!! It is time to nip it in the bud.
So we make the decision to tell them about Santa. We talk about legends and myths. We tell them that some people choose to play that legends are real because it is fun. We tell them that some people choose to use their imaginations and creativity to make Santa seem alive, and that is fine. But we have chosen not to.
We told them that we had made a vow of honesty to them, and that we had broken it. We were well meaning, but we had broken our vow, and we told them we were sorry. We told them that we never wanted them to doubt the truth in our words ever again. We also told them that we never wanted them to doubt the truth of Jesus Christ, or lose focus of him as the reason for Christmas.
We told them that other parents had fun playing the part, and to please not spoil their fun. We instructed them to never be rude when people asked them well-intended questions about Santa, such as "what did Santa bring you for Christmas?", but to politely answer them as if they believed.
It was not a popular decision with many family and friends. We were told that we were ruining the 'spirit of Christmas', and taking away our girls childhood. People even accused us of taking away our children's gifts. They still get gifts. No more - no less. They just know where they came from. And they know that when we celebrate Christmas, we are celebrating the birth of the coolest baby to ever have lived.
The following letter was given to us by some dear Christian friends of ours. We used it. It raised an interesting point, and my girls understood it. Of course, Alea argued at first... but that's another story.
Dear *******,
In first grade you’ve learned some interesting things about Santa Claus. You’ve learned that he has different names in different countries, and that he does different things in each. This variety of Santas has confused you, so I think it’s time to tell you the truth about who Santa Claus really is.
You see, Santa is real. It’s just that you don’t know him by his real name-mom and dad. Yes, it’s your father and mother who shower you with presents each year at Christmas time.
Why? Because we are joyfully celebrating Christ’s birthday the same way the three Wise Men did. Just as they brought gifts to the newborn Jesus, we give gifts to a child that we’re happy has been born, and that we love very much.
Why do we say someone else does it? I’m not sure. Maybe because we want to share with you the feeling of being loved by someone you haven’t actually seen. Like being loved by God. We don’t see God, but we do see what God does for us out of love. God gives us many gifts: our families, our homes, and our entire world.
We want to share the feeling of being loved no matter who you are or what you do, as God loves you. I know we sometimes say, “Be good if you want Santa to come,” when we want you to behave. But as you’ve already figured out, Santa-or rather, we-come anyway. And God does, too. God may not like what we do sometimes, but God always loves us.
I think it’s important that you know Santa is real, and that mom and dad are Santa. Because I don’t want you to be told Santa isn’t real, and have your wonder about if God is real.
Dad and mom become Santa every Christmas for a good reason. Because we want to share the love that God gave us when God shared the greatest gift of all-his son, Jesus
We love you,
Mom & Dad
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